March Madness: The Jordan Jones Method

The great Aristotle once said, "Hope is a waking dream," and there is never a greater time to dream than the middle of March.  The Ides of March may have been Caesar's downfall but for sports fans from Iowa it's the happiest time of the year.  We're nearing the NFL Draft and the Packers look good (rumors of a Wes Welker in our future sound great), despite another injury prone Derrick Rose season, the Bulls still have a chance, and the Cubs, well, hope springs eternal; this is our year.  However the biggest reason for unbridled optimism is this year's NCAA Tournament.  Iowa State is a 3 seed, UNI a 5, and my Hawkeyes are gearing up for a Friday night showdown with Davidson.  As a 7 seed it is eerily similar to their 2001 tournament where they beat Creighton only to fall to Kentucky in the second round.  Why do I mention the 2001 Tournament?  Perhaps it is because that was the last time we won a game in March Madness.  That's right, 2001, I was 12.  Here is a list of other things that happened when I was twelve:  had my first girlfriend, had my first real kiss, was going through puberty, thought I was going to be a baseball player, still believed in the federal government, learned what the federal government was, was a member of a church youth group, played five sports, and I bit through a battery (no joke).  It was a long time ago.  Through the 14 years since I have suffered through the Steve Alford disaster years, the NW St. (Where is that?) buzzer beater, the Cincinnati game, Pierre Pierce, The Lickliter era, and the angry Fran McCaffery, but all have led to the point where we are now. And I know that UNI and ISU may go far in the tournament (And honestly I hope they do) and I'm incredibly excited for my fighting Irish to hopefully break their string of bad luck, but I'll trade it all for just one win.  Give me one Iowa victory.  Herky needs hope and the best time for hope, the best time for anticipation is right now.  I'm really excited, but I'm not the only one.  

Everyone is excited.  Everyone is excited because they all still believe that their brackets can win the ESPN tournament or the office pool or the Madness bracket they devised with their friends years ago and always manage to fall short (surely I'm not speaking from personal experience).  We all believe that our gut is right, that our choices will be magic, and that this will finally be the year that we beat Taylor Clouse and Dan Miller (again surely not personal).  There are some of us that agonize our selections and spend hours filling out and refilling out dozens of brackets.  There are also some like my mother who picks Stanford because as she said, "they dancing tree is cute."  No matter what method you use whether it is logic, your gut, research, a coin toss, or the cutest mascot it is pretty much a crap shoot in the end (unless you picked a 16 to reach the finals, then you're just dumb).  In my own typically indecisive form, I filled out and submitted two brackets for each of my tournaments, one with Kentucky and the other with Arizona as champions.  However, ESPN allows you to fill out up to ten brackets so in true neurotic form I present a few ways to select your bracket that may be, shall we say, less conventional.  

I started out as I do every year with the coin toss and even managed to get a couple of possible teams in the final four, which included Maryland, UNC, Virginia, and SF Austin.  Heads won twice in a row giving Maryland the victory over Virginia.  I went with the alphabetical option, but a final four of Buffalo, Arizona, Albany, and Davidson with Albany cutting down the nets seems even more unlikely.  There is the academic bracket where you select winners based on team graduation rates with Belmont beating out Duke, Zona, and Kansas in the final four.  And of course there is Big Ten bias bracket where my Iowa Hawkeyes faced off against Michigan State with Wisconsin taking on Purdue.  All fun, but my three favorite I decided to share with you.  We will start with the least craziest and work up.

The Jordan Jones Method

Jordan Jones Ladies and Gentlemen

The Jordan Jones method is actually quite simple.  All you need is a bracket and one of our VCU student's Jordan Jones boredom to kick in.  Suffice to say, Jordan's knowledge of College Basketball is limited at best.  Let's analyze some of his picks.  First round upsets include Valpo, Indiana, Wyoming, Dayton, Belmont, OK St, Harvard, Ole Miss, Georgia St, Davidson, UAB, UCLA, and LSU.  Jordan decided to go with UAB over ISU, Wyoming over UNI, and Davidson over Iowa just to spite me.  He went with UCLA because of an apparent emotional fit over the mentioning of SMU and in typical Jordan fashion he went with Valpo because it was a funny name.  With obvious steps off the beaten path Jordan manages to have a decent elite eight with Kentucky, Indiana, Louisville,

Michigan St, Duke, Gonzaga, Wisconsin, and Georgia St.  He had a great commitment to VCU, but eventually went with what in his mind was the smart choice and concluded that Georgia St, a team that one their conference tournament 38-36 and in the process tore the achilles tendon of their coach in the celebration.  Although he seemed audibly pleased with Duke as a word, apparently Gonzaga was funnier so the Zags met the Cardinals with Louisville advancing and Wisconsin met Indiana with Indiana advancing, you know like anyone else would've picked.  With a Louisville v Indiana showdown, Jordan showed particular skill saying, "Louisville is good right?" and declared them the winners.  Obviously the Jordan Jones Method has some drawbacks but nowhere near the next concept.

The Team Nickname AKA Which One Would Win In A Fight Method

The Nickname Method is considerably more scientific than the Jones but has the drawback that it has nothing to do with basketball.  This led to a magical 16 seed over 1 seed upset as the Lafayette Leopards slipped by the Villanova Wildcats.  Although both wildcats in their own right, Leopards have a definitive species while a wildcat could be a tiger or could in fact be a feral cat.  Upsets in this bracket came from Purdue (Boilermakers over the bearcats, because bearcats are in fact lazy creatures and Boilermakers made trains and could run them over), Buffalo, Valpo (The Crusaders over the Terrapins, while a snapping turtle is ferocious, the Crusaders are fighting for God), Ole Miss, Ok St, Texas Southern (This 2 v 15 put the Tigers vs. the Wildcats and much like the Leopards before, the Wildcats went down), Lafayette, NC State, UC Irvine, Albany (this was a terrible matchup between Albany Great Danes and the Oklahoma Sooners aka settlers of Oklahoma), Belmont, Eastern Washington, Davidson, and N. Dakota St.  But for a more in depth analysis let's go deeper.

Sweet Sixteen Best Matchup:  The Baylor Bears against the Texas Southern Tigers.  I did far too much research into this matchup and by far too much I mean if I did any at all that would be too much.  There are factors that go into this fight.  Assuming that the bear in question is a brown bear they can weigh as much as 1700 pounds, they have a heightened sense of smell, they eat plants and fish, and usually are mostly vegetarian.  The tiger however has a great sense of hearing, can see in 3D, have heightened touch, can climb trees and jump over a basketball hoop, and they are also predatory carnivores.  However two pieces of information turned the tide.  The first comes from President Theodore Roosevelt who asserts in his book Hunting Trips of a Ranchman that a Bear would win in a fight against a tiger.  The second piece of information comes from a simulation from the Animal Planet which argues that the full force and power of the bear would win the day.  Baylor defeats Texas Southern.  Watch Animal Planet  Elite Eight Best Matchup:  The Duke Blue Devils vs. The Iowa State Cyclones.  This was difficult because it is a tornado vs. a demon, but upon further research I found that the demon angle is a new concept.  This is taken from the Duke Athletics website, "During World War I the Chasseurs Alpins, nicknamed "les Diables Bleus," were well known French soldiers. They first gained attention when their unique training and alpine knowledge was counted upon to break the stalemate of trench warfare in their native region of the French Alps. Unfortunately the Vosges Campaign in March, 1915, failed to alter the status quo even though the Blue Devils won accolades for their courage. However, their distinctive blue uniform with flowing cape and jaunty beret captured public imagination. When the United States entered the war, units of the French Blue Devils toured the country helping raise money in the war effort. Irving Berlin captured their spirit in song describing them as "strong and active, most attractive . . . those Devils, the Blue Devils of France."  You can't trust the French in a storm.  ISU over Duke. 

 Final Four Best Matchup:  The Iowa State Cyclones over the Michigan State Spartans.  This was a toss up.  You've got the Spartans who, amongst many accolades, stood 300 strong against the Persian Empire, but then you've got a tornado or a Typhoon or a hurricane.  I know that Michael Fassbender claims in 300 that they will "fight in the shade" after the Persian emissary claims their arrows will blot out the sun, but no amount of arrows can match wind speeds of an F5 and claim thousands of lives.  Iowa State is victorious Championship Game:  The Baylor Bears vs. the Iowa State Cyclones.  Tough luck Baylor, looks like you're going to Oz.  Iowa State wins the National Championship.  

So we managed to come out with a possible champion from that method and while unorthodox it would lead to some interesting match ups, but if you think that method was weird wait until the final one.  

The Famous Alumni As Decided by Ranker.com Method

This method, while time consuming is rather easy.  You go to Ranker.com, type in each school's most famous alumni list and then you choose whatever Ranker has as the number one.  Here's what I learned from this method:  Ranker loves Republicans, mediocre actors, racists, and serial killers.  When UCLA, the school with Alumni like Jackie Robinson, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, James Dean, Francis Ford Coppola, Arthur Ashe, and Carol Burnett as their famous alums you know that Ranker doesn't know what they're doing when the number one is Mila Kunis.  That being said here are the first round upsets.  Wofford (John Richardson owner of the Carolina Panthers over Golfer John Daly), Georgia St (Julia Roberts over Jeff Dunham), Ohio St (Jeffrey Dahmer over Boris Kodjoe), LSU (Shaq over Zach Galifinakis), Wyoming (Dick Cheney over Bill Stewart), Albany (Harvey Milk over Olivia Munn), and Davidson (Patricia Cornwell over Ashton Kutcher).  

Sweet Sixteen Best Matchups:  (1) Butler vs. Wichita State aka the battle of the psychos.  In this game we face off between Dennis Rader and Jim Jones.  For those who are unaware who these two "famous" people are let me fill you in.  Dennis Rader was a former US Air Force serviceman who was married with two children.  He worked with security services and was a member of the Lutheran Church.  Later it was found out that he was also known by another name "BTK" or Bind Torture and Kill due to the ten victims he murdered in the 70's and 80's.  Jim Jones was a much simpler man, husband and father of seven, he spend time as the head of his local church.  Unfortunately this position led to some turmoil in 1978 when he lead all 909 members of his church into a mass murder-suicide in the Jonestown Massacre.  Obviously a tough game, but Butler and Jim Jones manage to escape with the victory.  (2) ISU vs. Gonzaga or George Washington Carver vs. Bing Crosby.  Sorry Carver, you might have been a brilliant man who was called "the black Leonardo", but Peanut Butter doesn't come close to White Christmas in my book.  Elite Eight Best Matchup:  Duke vs. Gonzaga.  I love Bing Crosby but he never got 10% of the vote in Iowa 2008, that wonderful number is attached to Ron Paul.  Although I am not a big fan of the man and think he would make a terrible president, you have to give credit to a man that stood up in a Republican debate and said, "It's time we quit this, it's trillions of dollars that we're spending on these wars," that took some balls.  Duke Wins.  Final Four Best Matchup:  This one is a toss up.  We have UNC and Michael Jordan vs. Cincinnati and George Clooney.  Clooney net worth - $180 million vs Jordan - $1 billion.  Clear cut.  Jordan wins.  Championship:  In an all ACC final that would make Americans salivate at the thought of the championship between UNC and Duke.  "Republicans buy sneakers too."  Michael Jordan understands politics a little better than Ron Paul who wants to get rid of the IRS.  UNC victorious!

Unbridled optimism, anticipation, and hope.  No matter what method you use, we all think our bracket is the winner.  I just want one victory and for the rest, maybe I'll flip a coin and get Lafayette in the final four.  

Go get'em Lafayette

The Best Movies of 2014 Part III (AKA the final part)

Thank you to all the readers who made it through Parts I & II.  Welcome to Part III where we discuss, oh to hell with it, this is the part where I make up a bunch of categories and the few of you who aren't sick of my writing go along with it.  That sounds like enough of a preface.  On with the odds & ends of 2014 cinema.  

The worst movies of 2014

Nominee:  A Million Ways to Die in the West

Nominee:  The Amazing Spiderman 2

Nominee:  The Right Kind of Wrong

Nominee:  Cavemen

Nominee:  Divergent

Runner-up:  Transformers: Age of Extinction

Winner:  Nymphomaniac

---  As usual it would be hard for a year to go by without a lot of success stories, but even more flubs.  This year brought a first for me, the first time I've watched a superhero movie and was bored by the climax, which was the case with The Amazing Spiderman II, but luckily a few moments of grace (scenes with Emma Stone in them) managed to save this mangled mess of a script and turn into just a mess.  Unfortunately, and I do mean unfortunately because despite its horrendous script, lousy characters, and exposition written to make it ok that an older man is with a younger woman, Transformers 4 will not be its extinction, because it once again made over 240 million dollars.  However, there was one movie that took the proverbial shit cake position and that was the mess, pornographic, hallowed out shell of Lars Von Trier's two part disaster Nymphomaniac.  

I'm sure that the subject of nymphomania would make a very interesting documentary and even a fine piece of cinema in the right hands, but Von Trier does not have those hands.  Instead we watch a slow moving pornographic, hate piece.  I wanted to give this film its fair shake and so, I watched it.  Unfortunately that is as far as I was willing to go.  When you know you are watching sexploitation on screen is when the plot of the scene is based in the camera's desire to show skin rather than story (a note that Michael Bay should take into account).  Nymphomaniac may appeal, or at least Part I (Part II has no redeeming qualities), to a Von Trier completist, but after many attempts to see the good in these films I will have to admit that perhaps some artists are beyond even my own tastes.  And calling Von Trier an artist is a stretch.  

Best Movie Scene That Made You Go "What the Fuck"

Nominee:  Finding out what was in the "Protein Bars" in Snowpiercer

Nominee:  Rosamund Pike cutting Neil Patrick Harris's part short in Gone Girl

Nominee:  The Thug party in Dear White People

Nominee:  Hydra in Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Runner-up:  When Harry Potter shed his angel wings and turned into the devil in Horns

Winner:  Cleaning the tank in Fury

NPH: Never saw it coming

---Although I hate, and I do mean hate, modern acronyms like "LOL" and "LMFAO," which I still contend is a medical condition and should be seen to immediately, the acronym "WTF" is best suited for the moments from the above films.  The bugs from Snowpiercer, NPH's (oh no, I wrote another acronym) abrupt ending in Gone Girl, and Daniel Radcliffe going off the deep end in Horns all would be applicable, but there is one moment that is above all the rest.  This comes in the WWII tank film Fury when Logan Lerman is required to clean a spot where a comrade has fallen.  What he finds there is something that I won't be able to forget for many years to come, a part of the soldier's face, still intact.  To say I jumped out of my seat would be an understatement and while some of these moments were shocking, this one was mortifying.  

Best Line in a Movie

Nominee:  There's too much talk of sins, but not enough talk of virtues. ~Calvary (Brendan Gleeson)

Nominee:  We are Groot ~Guardians of the Galaxy (Vin Diesel)

Nominee:  “You don't want the bumpers. Life doesn't give you bumpers.” ~Boyhood (Ethan Hawke)

Nominee:  “If you want to win the lottery, you have to make the money to buy a ticket.” ~Nightcrawler (Jake Gyllenhaal)

Nominee:  “This is how it works man, the one with the gun gets to tell the truth.” ~Blue Ruin (Macon Blair)

Nominee:  “You see, there are still faint glimmers of civilization left in this barbaric slaughterhouse that was once known as humanity. Indeed that's what we provide in our own modest, humble, insignificant... oh, fuck it.” ~The Grand Budapest Hotel (Ralph Fiennes)

Nominee:  "You are the most talented most interesting most extraordinary person in the universe.  You are capable of amazing things." ~The Lego Movie (Chris Pratt)

Nominee:  "However bad life may seem, there is always something you can do and succeed at.  Where there's life, there's hope." ~The Theory of Everything (Eddie Redmayne)

Runner-up:  “You two are the most fucked up people I've ever met, and I deal with fucked up people for a living.” ~Gone Girl (Tyler Perry)

Winner:  "There are no two words in the English language more harmful than good job" ~Whiplash (JK Simmons)

---In the world of professional speech, we live and die with quotations.  This year in film gave us some memorable ones, from the sentimental in Guardians, Boyhood, and The Theory of Everything to the thought provoking in Calvary, Blue Ruin, Budapest Hotel.  There were even a few affirmations in The Lego Movie and Nightcrawler, but the two that made the finals came from moments of character honesty, one from Tyler Perry in dark comedy and the winner from JK Simmons reaffirming his central belief.  

Best Small Part

Nominee:  Evan Peters in X-Men: Days of Future Past

Nominee:  Seth Green in Guardians of the Galaxy

Nominee:  Mark Strong in The Imitation Game

Runner-up:  Godzilla in Godzilla

Winner:  Tyler Perry in Gone Girl

I need more Tyler Perry...Wait, what?

---You didn't have to have a major part to have a major impact in film this year.  As the old adage goes, "there are no small parts, only small players."  Evan Peters stole the show in X-men, Seth Green gave one of the best cameos of the year as Howard the Duck in Guardians, and Mark Strong's steely resilience led to a forceful background for Benedict Cumberbatch in The Imitation Game.  Unfortunately, Godzilla makes this list, and I sat unfortunately because he only appears in 10:30 of a 123 minute run time.  However, when he kills the monster that was pretty cool and at least we didn't have to deal with Matthew Broderick and fish this time. Of all the parts this year that could be deemed less that supporting, Tyler Perry was the best by a long shot.  I know, I, too, am shocked at the words that I have just written, but Perry is lightning in a bottle on screen.  I actually left the theatre saying, "I wish there was more Tyler Perry," words I have never, and will never say again.  This year the John Turturro Award, named because although Turturro is only in ten or so minutes of Big Lebowski we all remember "the Jesus", goes to Tyler Perry.  

Best Use of a Prop in a Film

Nominee:  Frank's Head in Frank

Nominee:  Camera as a Prop in Nightcrawler

Nominee:  The Drum Set in Whiplash 

Nominee:  Boxes of Candy in The Grand Budapest Hotel

Runner-up:  A Cassette Tape in Guardians of the Galaxy 

Winner:  The food in Chef

---There really is not competition here and although the music in Guardians makes the movie all the more excellent nothing can compete with the food porn that is in Chef.  I was disheartened to watch the film after I had begun my new diet, but enlightened when I found out that I can still make a few dishes of my own like the ones in the film and although mine don't resemble the same texture and color of Favreau's delicacies, they still taste delicious.  

Best choice by a director

Nominee/Runner-up/Winner:  Only letting Halle Berry have two lines in X-Men: Days of Future Past

---There is over 30 minutes of unused Anna Paquin/Halle Berry material that was cut out of X-Men.  Hooray!  When Berry was first cast in X-Men, the first one, we were all happy.  She had just come off of filming Swordfish, Bulworth, & Monster's Ball, but now her hurricane of a career has dried up and become drought-like with films like Die Another Day, Catwoman, Gothika, The Call, X-Men III: The Last Stand.  Recently she told US Weekly that, "It's hard to get roles as a woman of color."  I couldn't agree more, but Berry doesn't fail to get roles because of her skin color, but rather because of her talent.  Maybe she will return to the form she had before the first X-Men, but I doubt it.  

Biggest Oversight

Nominee:  Not teaching Kiera Knightley how to play a guitar in Begin Again

Nominee:  Making Transformers 4

Nominee:  Putting a love story in Godzilla

Runner-up:  Anna Paquin named as a Co-star in X-Men: Days of Future Past

Winner:  The fake baby in American Sniper

---Whether it was Knightley slapping at her guitar, Aaron Taylor-Johnson's attempts to show any type of human emotion towards Elizabeth Olsen, or Michael Bay making another terrible mechanical mess, plenty of "mistakes" were made in this year's films.  Perhaps the two most glaring involved Anna Paquin being named the third highest billed actor (although she's in the film for less than five seconds) and Bradley Cooper holding a fake baby.  Many believe that the fake baby kept Sniper from winning an Oscar, which is ludicrous, but no matter what you believe it was really really stupid.  

Movie that saw the future

Nominee:  Interstellar 

Runner-up:  Edge of Tomorrow 

Winner:  Draft Day

Browns still suck

---There were multiple films this year that "claimed" to see the future.  If the future in Interstellar true, then just shoot me now, and Edge of Tomorrow, well Edge of Tomorrow is entirely about seeing the future, but there is one film that literally showed the near future.  Draft Day starring Kevin Costner is about the first day of the 2014 NFL Draft where Costner, as GM makes a large number of ludicrous decisions only to have the plan work out in the end.  As the day continues, Costner manages to trade away picks to receive the overall number 1, then picks the guy no one expects, and as the day continues picks up another first rounder and eventually gets his picks back that he traded in the first day and gets one of the players everyone wanted (Not possible).  The Browns then go into the season with a good team and high hopes.  The film came out on April 11.  Then something weird happened.  A month later, the Browns pulled off a 2014 Draft that was eerily similar to the one in the movie getting a touted corner at 8 and then trading to receive the favorite buzz player Johnny Manziel at 22.  They even made a move to get into the top of the second round to get one of the best guards at 35.  The new GM Ray Farmer was called a genius with a fantastic first draft and the Browns went into the season with high hopes even managing to remain in first until week 12 and then, per usual, the Browns imploded and now they look like a catastrophe.  Perhaps next time the movie will be called Playoffs, help out one of the worst football cities in America.  

Best Joke

Nominee:  Putting Abed into Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Nominee:  "What do you got there, sweetie?  Is that a balloon?  It's not a balloon." ~Neighbors 

Nominee:  "Maggie, I know the dog dies.  Everyone knows the dog dies.  It's the book where the dog dies."~The Skeleton Twins

Runner-up:  “She has no idea. If I had a blacklight, this place would look like a Jackson Pollock painting.” ~Guardians of the Galaxy 

Winner:  "You fucked Captain Dickson's daughter? Captain? What the fuck, you bragged to him to his face! To his actual face, the captain, do you understand that (Points) this face" ~22 Jump Street

---Maybe I just really like childish jokes, but the series of jokes that lead up to the one above from 22 Jump Street had me jumping out of my seat laughing.  The Grand Budapest Hotel may have been the best critically acclaimed comedy of the year, but I loved Jump Street.  If you haven't seen it, do so, if you want to again, watch this clip ---->  22 Jump Street

The Weirdest Movie of 2014

Nominee:  Under the Skin

Nominee:  Lucy

Nominee:  The One I Love

Runner-up:  Frank

Winner:  Horns

---Under the Skin is incredibly weird, but it is after all an art film and The One I Love is weird, but that is due to a strange plot and it never strays away from that plot (I actually thoroughly enjoyed it).  When it comes to truly weird, like batshit crazy weird you need only look at Lucy, Frank, & Horns.  Lucy doesn't win, but not for like of trying, but for lack of me being able to complete watching it.  Frank comes very close, but like The One I Love it kind of makes sense (although the plot contrivance really doesn't need to exist).  However, Horns, the Daniel Radcliffe horror flick, and I do say horror, because it most certainly turns into a horror movie is beyond all comprehension.  It could've been the part where Radcliffe forces his brother to down enough drugs to kill a cult that sent me over the edge, but if it wasn't there it most certainly happened in the finale when Radcliffe grows angel wings only for them to burn off and for him to become the devil (or at least a devil, honestly I have no idea).  I guess it's my fault, after all the film was about a man who wakes up with devil horns, but I expected more of a parable than a parasite.   

The film that made me feel like I was on LSD

Nominee:  Under the Skin

Nominee:  Lucy

Runner-up:  Horns

Winner:  Frank

---Michael Fassbender spends 90% of the movie with a cardboard head on and a ridiculous accent while his band conducts the most insane music ever recorded and Maggie Gyllenhaal goes mental, all in the middle of nowhere before the mediocre keyboardist (Domhall Gleeson) corrupts the band by taking them to SXSW.  -----Need I say more?  

Most Awkward moment of 2014

Nominee:  The sex scenes in 300: Rise of an Empire

Nominee:  The end of Lucy, you know, where she becomes a non corporeal being.

Nominee:  Neil Patrick Harris's sex face in Gone Girl

Nominee:  The majority of the movie Under the Skin

Runner-up:  The worst date ever in Nightcrawler between Rene Russo and Jake Gyllenhaal

Winner:  The writers of Interstellar trying to explain how dust lines represent morse code.

I have no idea what is going on.

---300 is gratuitous, Lucy is insane, NPH's character is insane, Under the Skin fails to register its art with me, and the date in Nightcrawler is incredibly awkward, but brilliantly so, unnerving and queasy would be words associated with the scene as well.  But in terms of awkward nothing can match how awkward it must have been when two writers, Jonathan and Christopher Nolan (Who I love), tried to make sense of their own plot holes.  I imagine the conversation was something like this:

John:  So he sees the lines on the floor and due to how in line they are he interprets that to mean they must be morse code which send coordinates in the middle of nowhere (although conveniently within driving range) that he then takes his daughter (rather than turning back when he finds her as a stowaway) to find what is left of NASA, where he used to work.  

Chris: ….

John:  It might be a bit of a stretch, but I think it makes sense as long as we concoct a fifth dimension in the end of the film.  

Chris:  Sure.  

…

Chris:  Remember when I directed The Dark Knight?  That was a really good film, wasn't it? 

Most Important Film of 2014

The final award of the year goes to a film called The Tribe.  Don't worry if you haven't seen it because neither have I.  How am I therefore comfortable with proclaiming it to be the most important film of 2014?  Well, one, I don't work in film and two, just listen to the film's synopsis taken from IMDB:  A deaf teenager enters a specialized boarding school where, to survive, he becomes part of a wild organization - the tribe. His love for one of the concubines will unwillingly lead him to break all the unwritten rules within the Tribe's hierarchy. --but what is the catch?  Well the movie has taboo topics like full male nudity, full female nudity, illegal abortion and, oh yeah, the entire film is in sign language without any subtitles and the director didn't speak sign language so he used an interpreter.  This is one movie that when it comes to the states I cannot wait to see because as the film posits, "There are no subtitles because with love and hatred, you don't need translation."  See the trailer here ---> The Tribe Trailer

I love Hanks in a suit

Most anticipated movies of 2015

Winner:  Macbeth 

Winner:  Spectre

Winner:  Inside Out

Winner:  The Hateful Eight

Winner:  The Avengers: Age of Ultron

Winner:  Star Wars: VII  - The Force Awakens 

Winner:  Steve Jobs 

Winner:  The Revenant 

Winner:  Trumbo

Winner:  St. James Place

---There are many films that I am excited for but other than fan favorites like The Avengers, Star Wars, and Spectre, I cannot wait to see what the combination of Steven Spielberg, Tom Hanks, Alan Alda, and the Cold War come up with.  

On a Final Note...

R.I.P. Dot Matrix (Joan Rivers), John Hammond (Richard Attenborough), Vivian Rutledge (Lauren Bacall), Bret Maverick (James Garner), Tuco (Eli Wallach), Mother Sister (Ruby Dee), Smee and Eddie Valiant (Bob Hoskins), Egon Spengler (Harold Ramis), Secretary Albert Nimziki (James Rebhorn), and of course Sean Maguire, The Genie, Garp, Peter Pan, Batty Koda, Mrs. Doubtfire, Patch Adams, and John Keating (Robin Williams).  

Robin Williams touched so many lives with his gift and for many of my age it was the genie in Aladdin that changed our hearts and made us feel like we were in a whole new world. But for me it was his performance as John Keating in Dead Poet's Society that set me on my way. My teaching style is based on the teachings of three people: my father, Maggie Ellison, and John Keating. "No matter what anybody tells you, words and ideas can change the world." Thank you Robin Williams for changing my world.  "But only in their dreams can men be truly free. 'Twas always thus, and always thus will be." John Keating. I hope Robin found peace in his dreams.  

Goodbye Mr. Keating, you will be missed.