Top Tens, Rants, and Dan Miller

"I couldn't fall asleep in your arms, I'd be too busy looking into your beautiful eyes."

~Some stupid corny person

I was looking for a quote to start this week's post and this is the best I can come up with.  I was searching for quotes about being incredibly busy, and this one popped up first.  It has nothing to do with my life, but I am too tired and too busy to care.  As a graduate student, I knew that returning to college was going to be hard.  Undergraduate was difficult, but Graduate School is a whole other beast.  No, it's the same beast, except this time the beast has grown wings and sprouted a tail and is suffering from 'roid rage and hopped up on cocaine and heroin…and is trying to kill you.  That's Graduate school.  Not altogether terrible, but so very very busy.  

The Physical Representation of Grad School

So writing a long drawn out post just isn't in my repertoire tonight.  (AKA didn't have time to write the Star Wars Post).  Instead I will give you a short list.  The top ten meaningless things that are really pissing me off.  And the top ten meaningless things are like a Unicorn giving birth to a Rainbow.  Well, not meaningless, but in the grad scheme of things football and movies is less important than death and sickness.

Top Ten Things That Are Really Pissing Me Off

10.  Fantasy Football "Ties"

This last week I played in one of my best games of the season.  Wait, check that.  It was my best game of the season.  170 points.  170 points.  Most teams need two weeks to score that many but I did it in one.  Everyone on my team had double digits.  33 from Flacco, 30 from the Ravens D, and 23 from Arian Foster to name a few.  But due to some freak accident, I was playing the best person in the league.  She had two go for 40+.  And her total was 168, but because I am in a stupid league she got home field advantage +2 and had 170.  Sure I was upset, but hey in a tough league I'll take a tie.  BUT wait.  I lost.  Why?  Because there is a little clause in rules that says in the event of a tie you go to bench points.  F that noise.  My bench is there because I have players on bye weeks.  So I had 41 and she had 54.  She wins.  I'M PISSED.

9.  Ella Henderson Losing on X Factor

Yes, I watch the X Factor.  Not the annoying stupid American television show with Simon Cowell awkwardly hitting on a 20 year-old Demi Lovato, but the wonderfully posh British X factor.  Every Saturday and Sunday night.  This season it is incredibly easy to tell who has been the top two or three singers on the show.  It definitely includes Ella Henderson and James Arthur.  This week they were in the bottom two and Ella was voted off.  Ella has the voice of a 16 year-old Adele.  Hands down.  F that noise.  The British public instead chose to keep a Karaoke singer, another Karaoke singer (both great people but shit Singers), and a boy band that has a lead singer who looks like he went to the Zoolander school of one look poses.  Ella rocks.  I'M PISSED.

8. The Sales Tax in Richmond

It makes zero sense or cents.  Some places it is 5%, others it is like 13%, and at others it is non existent.  i just want my half and half Arnold Palmer for the 99 cents it promises me.  Is that too much to ask?  I'M PISSED

7.  Maryland and Rutgers Joining the Big Ten

This one is simple.  The Big Ten used to be about the Midwest.  Now it is about money.  I get that money was always part of the game, but it is now only about money.  And it isn't the Big Ten if they have 14 teams.  I don't want Iowa to play Maryland.  I don't want Iowa to play Rutgers.  Iowa playing in Maryland and near NYC is a joke.  I'M PISSED.

6.  People Who Still Care About the Election….The One in 2014

The election is over.  It was the dirtiest and costliest in American History.  Shut up about politics and GOVERN.  The problem with this country is people cannot see the difference between politics and government, they think they are the same thing.  They aren't.  I'M Mildly Pissed.

5.  Stupid Protests led by Stupid People

Protests used to mean something in this country.  Vietnam, Iraq, this isn't to say you need a war to protest, but the Occupy Movement was a great example as well.  However, the protests that take place on VCU's Campus…are idiotic.  Today was a protest to get out of Gaza.  I'm not attacking what they are standing for, I have no fully formed opinion on either side.  What I have a problem with is people who think that standing around, in the middle of Richmond, keeping ME from getting to the Library, yelling "1,2,3,4, Netanyahu out the door, 5,6,7,8 he murders babies."  One that doesn't rhyme.  Two…it doesn't work.  There is zero point in protesting in Richmond Virginia for something that they majority of the people didn't fully comprehend and there is no point in protesting here.  Go to Washington, Organize a nationwide protest, or LEARN SOMETHING about your subject first.  Dear god.  I'M PISSED.

4.  Mac Keeper

Every time I watch TV on my computer an ad for Mac Keeper pops up.  A 911 app for my computer.  I don't want you Mac Keeper.  Stop talking to me.  I'M PISSED, actually I'm not.  I'M ANNOYED.

3.  Stephenie Meyer

Sucks.  Period.  Meyer is a Mormon and while I have numerous issues with her religion I am not going to condemn her for her beliefs.  I have great friends who are Mormons.  I will however condemn her for writing a terrible soft core porn book in that of Breaking Dawn and the fact that she is a Mormon.  Or the part that all these books lead up to one thing.  Young girl gets married young entirely so she can blackmail Vampire and lose her virginity.  Yeah, great Mormon values there Meyer.  Now she has a new movie coming out called The Host.  The Host Trailer  Looks like total Horse crap.  And yet, and yet.  She is still so damn popular.  I'M PISSED.

2.  Doctors in Richmond

They suck.  Enough said.  I have my reasons.  Just give me an appointment.  I'M REALLY PISSED.

1.  Drivers in Richmond  

Richmond Drivers are the worst drivers on the face of the planet.  IT IS CALLED A TURN SIGNAL.  WILL SOMEONE IN THIS GODFORSAKEN CITY USE IT?!?!?!  Sorry.  I'M PISSED.

Top Ten Things That Are Like A Unicorn Giving Birth To A Rainbow

10.  Cloud Atlas 

Adam Ewing:  What is an ocean but a multitude a drops?

To say anything about this movie would give it away and at the same time I could reveal the entire plot and you would still have no idea what the hell it is about.  I was mesmerized and in love.  Yes, there are obvious plot holes, in the movie, not the book, and certain character crossovers didn't work but overall it got me to think in ways I had I never thought before.  Jim Sturgess gives a tour de force acting performance, but it is Tom Hanks who deserves to be nominated for best actor(s) for this movie.  The (s) you will get when you see the movie.  A guarantee it will win at least one Oscar for best Makeup Design.  I am pleased.  Cloud Atlas Trailer

9.  Butoh Theatre 

Is friction' awesome.  Butoh is the collective name for a diverse range of activities, techniques and motivations for dance, performance, or movement inspired by the Ankoku-Butoh movement. It typically involves playful and grotesque imagery, taboo topics, extreme or absurd environments, and is traditionally performed in white body makeup with slow hyper-controlled motion, with or without an audience. There is no set style, and it may be purely conceptual with no movement at all.  And I love it.  And I will be performing it.  I am pleased.

8.  Milton Jones/Stewart Francis

One Line Comedians for the win.  In researching a paper topic for a Comedian thesis I have found two of my favorite Comedians who express their wit, a few words at a time.

Milton Jones:

Old ladies in wheelchairs with blankets over their legs, I don’t think so…retired mermaids.

About a month before he died, my grandfather, we covered his back full of lard – after that he went downhill very quickly.

Stewart Francis:

I have a girlfriend.  I've been going out with my girlfriend for…..sex.

My Father was a man of few words, I remember he used to say to me, "son."

I am more than pleased.

7.  Ron Barber Wins!

Finally.  Ron Barber is re-elected Congressman of the great state of Arizona.  I am pleased.

6.  Castle:  The Final Frontier

An episode of the TV show Castle from November 5th.  The entire episode is a gigantic Firefly reference and while I am not a massive fan of that show, I did enjoy Serenity, and I love Nathan Fillion.  I am pleased.

My Homework

5.  My Dog Ate My Homework  

For the first time in my life I can actually say that my dog ate my homework when my dog ate my copy of Paula Poundstone's book the second it came in the mail.  I should be pissed, but I thought it was hilarious.  Go figure.  I am surprisingly pleased.  

4.  In My Mind:  The Hamsters  The Hamsters

For no reason what so ever, I love the Kia Soul Hamster commercials.  I think they are a mixture of the most adorable things and the coolest things on ad television.  Something about hamsters, ballet, and Opera turning into a dance club is sweet.   And I love the song that goes with the new one.  I am very pleased.

3.  The Saints and the $30 Sub

Due to the immense amount of work that I have to finish, I had to cancel all of my Thanksgiving plans.  Sad.  However that does mean that I get to have my $30 Sub and watch the Saints.  For those who don't know, a tradition that started in 2006, every Thanksgiving I watch The Boondock Saints and make a two foot long Sub sandwich with over 25 toppings that usually costs around $30 - $50 to make.  I am very pleased.

2.  Notre Dame #1 in the BCS

YEA BABY!!!  Oregon goes down.  K-State goes down and finally the 11-0 Fighting Irish are 1 win away from the National Championship.  I have never been more excited to be a sports fan.  And Matt Barkley is out this weekend for USC.  1 game.  I am STOKED!!!

Going down Daniel...

1.  Dan Miller

Dan Miller is my best friend.  We met in college during a silly school political campaign, one we both lost, and have remained close ever since.  I consider him to be a part of my family.  Which is why I cannot wait for the IRISH TO BEAT DOWN USC SO I CAN STUFF IT DOWN HIS THROAT.  His constant nagging all season long about how much the Irish suck and how badly they are going to get beaten is all the fuel I need.  If the Irish win on Saturday I will never let him live it down.  Ever.  Ever.  I mean, what are friends for.

A few quotes from the great Daniel Miller, a die-hard Oregon State Fan, but current Law Student at U of Oregon:

October 20th:  "OSU (Oregon State) is better than ND."  &  "But OSU is better.  Better offense, better defense.  Didn't need the refs to gift us a game."

October 27th:  "That's a good win for y'all.  But USC is gonna smoke you unless lee gets injured."  &  "You'll still lose to SC so I'm not worried."  &  "They are gonna stomp ND.  Offense is too good.  Landry Jones and Okla has no wideouts like Marquise lee or woods."  &  "We (OSU) would beat you if we played.  But clearly you deserve to be ranked higher.  I hope bama loses and you win out and play oregon or OSU in the natty."  (The Week OSU lost to UW)

November 3rd: "That's because Oregon is so good on offense."  &  "Oregon will win, can't stop this train, Oregon is too good, might score 70, Oregon is unstoppable."

November 17th:  "Oregon is gonna win.  And this is perfect for me.  Then we can beat ND."  &  "Just wait.  We'll win then we'll come beat that ND ass."  

OREGON LOSES- K STATE LOSES

"I'm not even worried.  SC is gonna stomp y'all next week.  THen you can meet oregon in a bowl and get killed."

…"The best revenge is massive success."  ~Frank Sinatra.   "….and a whole lot of gloating."  ~Me

Go Irish!  ND Fight Song

What We Learned: The 2012 Election

On Tuesday, November 6th over 120 million votes were cast in the election for President of the United States.  A voter turnout of 57.5%, down from 2008 (62.3%) and 2004 (60.4%), but up from the 2000 election turnout rate of 54.2%.  One of the highest voter turnout rates in the nation came from the battleground of Iowa (and home of this writer) with over 1.5 million votes tallied equaling a rate of 71.7%, second highest mark in state history.  Way to go Iowa!

1.) A country voted.  People exercised their rights as Americans, candidates were chosen, and after months of negative political ads, of pundit sniping, of record numbers in campaign contributions, almost EVERYTHING stayed the same.  Look at the numbers:

2008 Presidential Election:  Senator Barack Obama (53%) Defeats Senator John McCain (45.7%).  Total votes cast: 129,446,455.  Electoral: Obama - 365, McCain - 173

2012 Presidential Election:  President Barack Obama (51%) Defeats Mitt Romney (48%).  Total votes cast:  120,565,359.  Electoral:  Obama - 332, Romney - 206.

2010 Congress/Senate Election:  House/Senate:  GOP: 242/47, Dems: 193/51, Ind: 0/2

2012 Congress/Senate Election*:  House/Senate:  GOP: 233/45, Dems: 194/53, Ind: TBD/2

The Difference:  Under 9 million less votes for the Presidential Election, GOP picks up 33 Electoral votes (and is still crushed), House about the same (multiple elections still being decided), and the Dems pick up 2 Senate seats.  Cost of the Presidential Election:  1.6 billion dollars. Total cost of all elections:  6 billion.

Let that sink in a little.  Cost of the Presidential Election: 1.6 billion dollars.  Total cost of all elections:  6 billion dollars.  Mind blowing.  Let's chat a little bit about this number.  The median income in the US is around $29,000.  If you saved every single penny and never spent a CENT, it would take you 206,892 YEARS to make 6 billion dollars.  Let's say you have 6 billion dollars, what would you buy.  Now I know me.  I am a man of simple wants.  If I was a billionaire I would want a few simple things:

Chicago Theatre Company:  ($35 Mil)

Season Tickets to the Cubs for Life:  (Assuming I live to be 85, $12.1 Mil)

Personal Masseuse ($254,000) 

1968 Ford Mustang Shelby GT500 ($120,000)

Chrysler 300 (I'm rich so how about a few) (Whole 2013 series- $200,000)

An Island w/ a Castle  ($25 Mil)

Maybe a small town  ($900,000)

Booth Wanted Poster ($200,000)

Original Playbill from Julius Caesar  ($40,000)

T-shirt gun:  (Lim. Ed. Nike $1,500)

My Island Castle

Total Cost:  $73,815,500.  Oh crap.  I still have to spend nearly 5.9 billion dollars.  What is a guy to do.  

What about a race that wasn't the Presidential one.  In the Indiana Senate, Democrat Joe Donnelly defeated Republican Richard Mourdock in a heated race.  Total amount spent:  25 Million.  Donnelly received about 1.2 million votes and Mourdock received 1.1 million.  Based on the amount of money that each spent, Donnelly spent $9 per vote and Mourdock spent $12 per vote in defeat.

6 Billion dollars, the most costly election in history, both financially and perhaps morally.  Just amazing.  And we wonder why we are in debt.

2.)  Super PACS run politics in America.  For just the Presidential election here are the top ten contributors to the major campaigns, nine are SuperPACS and nine are Republican.

Name $$$ Raised Party Affiliation 

1. Restore our Future         $142,645,946 (R)
2. American Crossroads         $91,115,402 (R)
3. Priorities USA Action         $66,482,084 (D)
4. RNC         $40,166,559 (R)
5. Americans for Prosperity $33,564,920 (R)
6. Crossroads GPS         $22,133,006 (R)
7. American Future Fund $19,038,220 (R)
8. Winning Our Future         $17,008,038 (R)
9. Americans for Job Security $15,223,067 (R)
10. Ending Spending Action Fund $9,928,188         (R)

We need to fix campaign finance.  Al Franken, I believe in you.

3.)  I never have fully agreed with the way that Keith Olbermann presents the news, but I am reminded of a segment he did on MSNBC's Countdown every night, "The worst person in the world."  Well, here is my list for the worst people of the 2012 election cycle.

• Congressional Candidate Gabriela Mercer for comparing all "middle Easterners" to "Mexicans" and saying "those people, their goal in life is to cause had to the United States."
• John Koster, Todd Akin, and Richard Mourdock for you know, that whole "rape thing."
• Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell: "The single most important thing we want to achieve is for President Obama to be a one-term president."  Good work Mitch. 
• Michele Bachmann, Newt Gingrich, and Herman Cain:  Do I really need to explain why?  One thing, a Bachmann Prediction for election day:  "I believe 2012 will be a wave election that goes all the way across the US, it will even take in the Golden State."  Claiming that California would be a red state.  Oh Michele, Obama won by 20%.
• Dick Morris and Jim Kramer:  For making the two stupidest predictions of the campaign season.  Morris:  Predicted a Romney landslide of epic proportions.  Kramer:  "The Presidential race is nowhere as close as the polls suggest."  His projection.  Obama-440/Romney-98.  He said Texas would be blue.
• Jeffrey Toobin:  For his declaration on the death of Obamacare.  "a train-wreck for the Obama Administration."  Oops.
• All of Fox News:  Duh
• Most of CNN:  Also Duh.  But still love me some Anderson Cooper
• Florida:  From their mini-book of a ballot to the fact they still cannot count ballots.
• Arizona:  Also cannot count ballots.  I know I worked there.  It hasn't improved.

Much like on Countdown here is the medal rounds:

Bronze:  Karl Rove.  The once great orchestrator of the Bush campaign victories looked like a bumbling, stumbling fool on election night.  Especially when FOX NEWS even started to go against him.  If you haven't seen the footage, watch the daily show from November 7th.  Classic.

Silver:  Chris Matthews.  I know, shocked aren't you?  I chose a Democrat.  Chris Matthews is the reason why sometimes I hate the party that I am affiliated with.  He is not a newsman, he is a moron.  Here is his quote from election night.  "I'm so glad we had that storm last week because I think the storm was one of those things.  No, politically I should say.  Not in terms of hurting people.  The storm brought in possibilities for good politics."  Chris Matthews has always been a windbag, but now he is a pompous asshole.  I wish I could give him the gold, but there is one other person.

Gold:  The Donald.  Could anyone else have won this award?  Donald Trump is 100%, bonafide, bat-shit crazy.  From his four year tirade of the President on whether or not he is an American, to his own "run" for President, to his new call for the President's grades from college.  But election night brought out another side of Donald.  Not the demented, conspiracy nut-bag, but the tea-bag, musket holding, revolutionary nut bag.  A few "tweets" from Election night:  "This election is a total sham and a travesty.  We are not a democracy," and "Lets fight like hell and stop this great and disgusting injustice!  The world is laughing at us."  He went on to talk about how the Electoral college is a joke and how Romney won, which he didn't.  Then he went…cuckoo.  "We can't let this happen.  We should march on Washington and stop this travesty.  Our nation is totally divided," and the great finale, "We should have a revolution in this country."  The Donald is the Worst Person in the World.

4.)  America likes Gay marriage and Weed.  Hooray.  No real comments here other than I am supremely happy.  For the marijuana issue, I am excited to begin making money off of the stuff instead of fighting a war that is meaningless.  For the Gay Marriage issue, anyone who knows me knows that this was definitely the highlight of my election night.  Equality.  “At some point in our lifetime, gay marriage won't be an issue, and everyone who stood against this civil right will look as outdated as George Wallace standing on the school steps keeping James Hood from entering the University of Alabama because he was black.”  ~George Clooney.

5.)  Amongst the many victories that occurred on Tuesday from the Senate in Mass. to the Senate in Wisconsin.  From the White House in DC to the churches in Washington, there were a few losses that hit me quite hard.  I wish to end my rant by thanking a few people for running and one for his dedicated service.  

Mike Henning for State House Montana-17:  I didn't vote in this election, I don't know Mike Henning, and I barely know where District 17 is on a map of Montana.  My connection to this race is with his daughter, Amber, a friend and former fellow camper with me at Missoula Children's Theatre.  When Mike first ran in 2010, Amber told me about his campaign, and then after his defeat I watched his 2012 campaign closely, well as closely as one can from across the country.  I don't like Mike Henning because I know his daughter.  Some of my friends worked for Romney, some hate Obama, and even one worked on the Todd Akin campaign, a man whose existence in politics makes me squeamish, so obviously I don't always listen to my friends.  I like Mike Henning because of his dedication to his family, because of his steadfast determination to his job and to his state, but most importantly because of his views of education.  For me, education is right behind gay rights on the political scale of most important issues in my book.  In the recent legislative session, Montana is one of the few states that has a large (450+ Million) surplus, but has failed to help students with the money that they have allocated.  His opponent, a woman by the name of Christy Clark voted multiple times against education (I know, broad term) in Montana by voting for a 5% raise in tuition, by attempting to destroy teacher retirement, and finally she voted for HB 154, a bill that sought to eliminate the BA degree requirement for a Superintendent of Public Instruction.  All of this might seem small to you, but these measures, especially the last one are incredibly important.  Coming from a town which has suffered under the leadership of terrible Superintendents, I understand the value of adequately preparing people for the jobs that they are to undertake.  I wish I could make it a masters mandatory, but I am not in the house.  Mike is a dedicated serviceman and a fantastic advocate for the young people of Montana and his opponent, frankly, is not.  Mike, "Montana deserves better and I want to do what is right for the people in my district."  Unfortunately, Mike will not get that chance as he lost his race to Clark.  I hope for the sake of many issues, some not discussed here, that Mike Henning will run again.  Hopefully third time will be the charm.

Nate Willems is a wonderful father, husband, and has been a great member of the State House for Iowa since 2009.  His wife went to school with my siblings and is a teacher at my old high school and both of the Willems have been good friends to me and my family for many years.  This year, after re-districting, Nate decided to run for State Senate and in a shocker, to me at least, he was defeated by Dan Zumbach.  Unlike Mike Henning above a lot of the people who will read this blog know Nate and all I wish to do is thank him for his service to our state, to our neighborhood.  Janette Voss of Ryan says this on his campaign website, "Nate will do a great job representing rural Eastern Iowa in the State Senate. He works hard; he shares our common sense values. He is an effective leader for all Iowans."  Simple.  True.  Honest.  

Finally, Ron Barber.  As of the publishing of this blog post, Ron is ahead in the count.  

Ron Barber: 132,750

Martha McSally: 132,420

Ron and Gabby triumphant

Difference: Barber +330

When election night was drawing to a close he was down by over a thousand votes.  There are still many more ballots to count, but as of now it looks like Ron is on the uptake.  I hope and pray that he wins.  This seat is very personal to me.  In 2010 I worked the grassroots campaign to try and get the last Democrat that stood in the Winner circle elected.  That was Gabrielle Giffords.  Giffords, of course has since resigned to continue her recovery and Barber, her district director, also wounded in the shooting, ran in a special election and has served for the past few months.  I know Ron Barber, not very well, but from what I do know of him, he is a man of steadfast integrity, of great moral judgment, and of honest humanity.  Essentially, he is the male Gabby.  If he wins, Arizona will be the better for it.  But if he is destined to lose, I thank him for his service.  

The 2012 Election is over.  Please can we get on with the governing now.

(Next blog post:  Why the purchase of Lucasfilm by the Disney Corporation is a good thing)

Why I Voted

And so the long awaited day has finally arrived on our doorsteps.  The campaigns are over.  All that is left is for the balloons to be blown, the champagne to be stocked, and over one hundred million Americans to vote.  Take that number in.  Over one hundred Million Americans and that isn't even a very good voter turnout, but still, one hundred million people.  Each one with theories and thoughts and dreams and visions for what they believe this country should stand for.  Some will vote for less than desirable reasons.  Because of a racist or bigoted belief or an unsubstantiated understanding of a religion.  Some will vote because one candidate is much better groomed, can hold a conversation, or has a cleaner smile.  Some will vote on the broken foundations of lies, half truths, and equivocal remarks.  Some will vote incorrectly because they failed to understand which chad they were punching out.  And then there are some, a hopeful majority, that will vote with a pen and ballot.  They will walk into a booth and with a few quick marks they will allow their educated opinions to flow from their minds into their hands and onto the ballot.  Their minds will become their voices.  Their ballots will become their words.  For all reasons, good and bad, one hundred million Americans.  It's difficult not to be poetic.  

Today marks the end of the dirtiest presidential campaign (financially) of all time.  Lies became the common soapbox for both of the candidates, with a few stranglers trying to find boxes to stand on.  This was a campaign cycle that will produce the first collective sigh when the polls close, not when the winner is announced.  We were inundated with millions of ads, with constant media coverage, and the majority of it was negative.  Even the third party candidates, some whom so excellently threw their hats into the ring, couldn't help but join in the onslaught of anti-opponent rhetoric.  But this election was more than two animals duking it out in the ring.  It was, at its core, a battle for the future of this country.  The election should have boiled down to a set of ideals against another set of ideals, but as always, it devolved much more into a character based pissing match.  But then again so are all presidential elections.

But today does not just mark the end of the presidential race, but the ends of thousands of races nationwide.  With state candidates, state measures, and state judges lives, careers, and the future of our homes hang in the balance.  Here are a few:

In Maine, Maryland, Minnesota, and Washington citizens will go to the polls to decide the future of same sex marriage.  In California, the death penalty returns to the ballot.  In Arkansas, Colorado, Massachusetts, Montana, Oregon, and Washington marijuana is being voted on either medically or for statewide legalization.  And in Alabama, Florida, Montana, and Wyoming Obamacare makes its way into the state arenas.  

In Missouri, current Republican Congressman Todd Akin runs for Senate.  Earlier in the campaign he said on the topic of Abortion, "If it's a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try and shut that whole thing down."

In Indiana, Republican Senate candidate Richard Mourdock, when asked whether abortion should be allowed in case of rape of incest replied with, "I think even when life begins in that horrible situation of rape, that's something God intended to happen."

In Arizona, Republican Congressional candidate Gabriela Saucedo Mercer had this to say about immigration.  "If you know Middler Easterners, a lot of them, they look Mexican or they look, you know, like a lot of people in South America, dark skin, dark hair, brown eyes.  And they mix. They mix in.  And those people, their only goal in life is to, to cause harm to the United States.  So why do we want them here, either legally or illegally?"  

A lot is at stake today.

But why did I vote?  And what did I vote for?  Many of you will be able to see my earlier blog post about logic and morality, about my decision to vote for either Obama or Stein.  Well in the end I made up my mind.  And although guessing who I ended up voting for isn't very hard, I will still remain silent as to the actual candidates that I voted for.  I will support who I wish to in public, but my vote is still private to me.  Well, at least somewhat private. 

I voted for healthcare.  I voted for gay marriage.  I voted for economic recovery.  I voted for peace.  I voted for education.  Those are the issues.  But I voted for the graduate student who works to support his ability to work in a profession that won't pay him the money that he is paying for the education to go into that profession.  He slaves all day and night, can't afford tuition, but takes out loans, and still manages to come to class with a smile.  He smiles even through the pain that is gushing through his veins everyday.  I voted so that he can continue to smile.  I voted for the two men, waiting outside City Hall with a line miles long.  They wait, with no hope in sight, but a promise to each other.  They wish to each smile and say two words a piece and then in a moment of ultimate ecstasy touch lips to seal their vows.  I voted for them.  I voted for the mother of three who works to feed her children and on lucky days, even herself.  She cleans up after wealthy men and women who drop crumbs on her doorsteps without any thought of the action.  I voted for her.  I voted for the marine in a foreign land who put down his gun and exchanges it for a pen and paper so that he can report the news only to be captured by the news he was covering.  I voted for him.  I voted for a fourth grade girl whose books crackle and tear with every page turned, but she uses what little change she has to buy tape, so that she can learn as much from the book and then pass it on to the next generation.  I voted for her.  

I voted for a judge who looked at a case and represented the law with respect and courtesy. 
I voted for a retired teacher who practiced her lessons every day.

I voted for a husband, a father, a friend, and a courier of righteous government.

I voted for a representative of moral fiber and rich kindness.

And I voted for a man who from time to time shows that he is human even when his public require him to be larger than the frame that he fills.  Someone that I disagree wholeheartedly with some of his decisions, but I understand his predicament.  And finally, someone whose soul represents what is good within all citizens of this country.  

I voted.

I hope that you do to.

"Always Believe."

The Final Countdown

Music has allows been the resounding heartbeat behind any major presidential campaign.  When I had the idea for this week's blog post I asked many of my political friends what song puts you in the mood for campaign season?  What song lets you know, oh shit, time to go to work, candidates to elect and all, especially in the final sprint to the finale.  A couple said, Europe's "The Final Countdown," another wrote "Power" by Kanye West, and another said, "I Want you Back" by the Jackson Five.  The last one is a little weird, but then again the person who wrote it has always been a little bit of a nut bar.  For me, it has always been the same song.  The one that I dare you to stop tapping your foot.

"Jet Airliner" by Steve Miller Band.  Aside from the fact that it was used during a Presidential Campaign, albeit a fictional one, I have always had a love affair for this song.  It was used in Episode 134, "The Mommy Problem," from one of the greatest television shows ever created, "The West Wing."  

Leavin' home, out on the road 

I've been down before 

Ridin' along in this big ol' jet plane 

I've been thinkin' about my home 

But my love light seems so far away 

And I feel like it's all been done 

Somebody's tryin' to make me stay 

You know I've got to be movin' on 

Oh, Oh big ol' jet airliner 

Don't carry me too far away 

Oh, Oh big ol' jet airliner 

Cause it's here that I've got to stay 

In a day and age when presidential campaigns are almost all run by multi-million dollar airline jets, this song always reminds me of the road.  My other political campaign song comes from my time in Arizona, "Ch-Check It Out" by Nicki Minaj w/Will.I.Am., but I will leave that up to the imagination as to why.  Colin Dyer knows why and we will take it to the grave with us.  

To say that a presidential campaign is won or lost by a campaign song is idiotic, but every little bit helps.  From the Harrison/Tyler campaign of 1840, with the Whig Party hymnal "Tippecanoe and Tyler Too" to the 1960 Election for JFK with the song inventively titled, "Kennedy" where the song consisted of a shit ton of brainwashed people singing "Kennedy" over and over again, campaign musical notes have rifled through the airwaves.  

More recently the importance of picking a Campaign Theme Song has become crucial for each candidate.  Hilary Clinton went on a nationwide search, even creating a Sopranos parody ad just to promote the eventual choice of "Takin' Care of Business," which apparently she was not.  Some choices are corny.  Both the Bush's chose equally stupid picks for their first runs at office, "This Land is Your Land" for Herbert Walker and "We the People" for Dubya.  Some choices are corny, but effective.  Both Gore and Romney used Bachman Turner Overdrive's "You Ain't Seen Nothing Yet."  And then there are the completely absurd, weird, cockeyed, wacko choices.  I can think of two of the top of my head in recent history, both ended up being Vice Presidential Nominees.

Joe Lieberman chose the song "We are Family" by Sister Sledge during his campaign for the 2000 election.  That's right, "We are Family," the hit amongst drag-queens and Miami club owners.  "We are family.  I got all my sisters with me.  We are family.  Get up ev'rybody and sing."  That song.  Now obviously I have zero problem with the lifestyle of Drag Queens and think they should be celebrated…but not by Joe Lieberman.  And who are Sister Sledge?  A group of African American Sister Singers from Philadelphia.  Joe, what the hell do you know about anything that I have just said?  Joe Lieberman's song should have been Weird Al's "White and Nerdy."

Weird Wacko Song #2:  Paul Ryan chooses "We're Not Gonna Take it" by Twisted Sister.  By the way, Dee Snider was so pissed that Ryan used this song in rallies that he wrote numerous cease-and-desist letters and the song no longer exists when Ryan enters.  Now you may be asking yourselves, what is my problem with Twisted Sister?  Nothing.  They are the Iron Men of Rock and Roll and Dee Snider is a legend.  But Ryan using a song written by a group that promoted Anarchy and free thinking hippie agendas, yeah, that's an issue.  And he tried to steal it from Snider.  I will let Snider tell you what he thinks, "I emphatically denounce Paul Ryan's use of my song 'We're Not Gonna Take It' as recorded by my band Twisted Sister. There is almost nothing on which I  agree with Paul Ryan, except perhaps the use of the P90X."

So there have been a few crappy song choices.  But much like The Daily Show with Jon Stewart when it comes to campaign convention videos, I, too, believe in a touch of revisionist history.  So here, with no concept of actual time periods of when songs originated, are a few ideas I might have suggested for the candidates for the last four presidential election cycles:

2000 Election:

George W. Bush:  Lost!  (Coldplay)

Dick Cheney:  Heartless  (Kanye West)

Vs 

Al Gore:  Almost  (Bowling for Soup)

Joseph Lieberman:  There's Another Dumbass on the Mountain  (Those Darn Accordions)

2004 Election

George W. Bush:  I've Got a Lovely Bunch of Coconuts

Dick Cheney:  Broken Soul  (Seventhseal)

VS

John Kerry:  Help  (The Beatles)

John Edwards:  Smile and Pretend  (Dale Inskeep)

2008 Election

Barack Obama:  Hope Now  (Addison Road)

Joe Biden:  Keep Your Mouth Shut  (Blueheels)

VS

John McCain:  Heart Attack  (Trey Songz)  

Sarah Palin:  The Biggest Idiot in the World  (Aroah)

2012 Election

Barack Obama:  I Keep Hoping  (Foreigner)

Joe Biden:  Malarky  (Nu Brand Flexx)

VS

Mitt Romney & Paul Ryan:  It's the End of the World as We Know It  (R.E.M.)

"Always Believe"